My first pair of maternity pants, I just had to share a pic!

I BOUGHT MY FRIST MATERNITY SHORTS!!! WOOHOO!

I went to target with a friend today and for fun she talked me into trying on some maternity shorts. This same friend just had a garage sale (it was a neighborhood garage sale) so I helped her sit in lawn chairs all day lawn taking money from the shoppers. I was BAKING! I couldn't find any shorts to wear and all I had was one skirt that still fit me so I put on the skirt. By the end of the day I was wishing I hadn't worn a skirt all day while sitting in a lawn chair because it wasn't very comfortable. I realized how bad I needed some summer shorts to wear.

I tried on the shorts today and THEY FIT! I was excited. I bought them and will probably wear them and the others I plan to buy now that they fit, every weekend from now until Coop is born.

I had to share a picture of me in my first maternity clothes. So much fun. I have plenty of room to grow.

I hope your all good!

Neat freak!

I'm not usually the type to constantly want things perfect around the house. Now that being said, The last few weeks something has changed. My hubby and I cleaned the house over the holiday weekend (of course me being on light duty) but it looks AMAZING! My mom also came to visit and helped me in our yard, it also looks AMAZING! The entire house is looking its best right now. So last night I go to cook dinner and I cleaned as I cooked, I even swept the kitchen quickly after I cooked just in case something fell on the floor. THIS IS SO UNLIKE ME! I like this new me because its so nice to come home to a clean house. I guess I'm slowly getting my energy back from the first tri-mester sick tired stage.

I'm 22 weeks this week. YAY, I'm so close to starting 6 months. Although its going by slow its weirdly passing by fast too! I don't know how to explain it? This week I just started to really realize that there is a big chance now that my placenta is rising from my cervix opening that I might actually be able to give birth. That scares me. I normally don't let myself think about this sort of thing because I know God will take care of me but I've just been realizing I might have to push this little baby boy out. YIKES. Its scary!

We are really starting to get into all the baby prep. The room is slowly starting to be put together. Our showers are being talked about more and its all so exciting!
I went and bought some new shirts this weekend. I actually bought some regular non-maternity shirts. The style right now is so perfect with the high waste lines and bubble look. So I found so many that I had plenty of space in and why the heck would I not buy in style shirts that fit even if they aren't maternity. Now trust me I don't look like a young in shape girl wearing them, I look pregnant but they fit and still have tons of extra space. So why not?
I'm still not in maternity pants yet. They just don't fit right. The legs are always so big and the butt. I need a pair of jeans that fit like mine do but with the maternity belly in them.
I've considered getting a pair or two of cheep jeans and having my aunt sow in a panel. Until I can fit in the maternity jeans.

As far as how I'm feeling, I've been feeling good. I'm having some growing pains. Those round ligaments at the lower side of my stomach are really hurting and stretching. But its so worth it. I've also been noticing that I'm feeling sick If I don't snack throughout the day. I had stopped feeling that way toward the beginning of the second tri-mester but now it seems to have started up again. I'm not sure if my blood suger is low or what?
Our little guy is moving so much. He moves allot after I eat and around 11:00 and 6:00 every day I feel him for sure. Then I feel him sporadically throughout the day. We go back to the doc on June 5Th. It seems so far away but its only a week and 2 days from today so I can't wait!!!

Thanks for all your support girls. You truly make me feel better and I love having such a great support system. My prayers are with you all in your journeys. I hope your all doing well.

So do I really look that small?

Tonight my husband and I met a couple we are friends with and their one year old daughter. We are walking in the restaurant and we run into a girlfriend of mine. She is there with two of her friends. She is telling me how great I look and how happy she is for us. Asking how far along we are (21 weeks starts today by the way :) as I say 21 weeks, one of the girls she's with starts saying loudly in a rude tone "oh my god, there is no way your 21 weeks. You don't even look pregnant. I'm not even going to stand up because you would be shocked if you see me at 26 weeks". I try to ignore this girl because she's not saying it in the nice way like "oh you look so good" no she was saying it rudely trust me. So I ignore her and sit down to eat with our friends but I can hear her saying over my shoulder how she can't believe how small my tummy is and that I'm 21 weeks. With this horrible tone and rude comments under her breathe. Normally I wouldn't let this sort of thing bother me but hormones and stuff and being so excited to be pregnant after all the meds and trying I of course want to look pregnant. So I let it bother me. I couldn't help but share this with you girls because it bothered me. Am I really that unbelievably small? I started out my pg 5' 2" weighing 106. I'm petite. I know weigh 117 and there is just what I would call a volley ball under my shirt. Not huge but bigger than my usual none the less. I eat good, the baby is growing good and my dr. never seemed worried so maybe he's just in there really good and tight in a ball? I don't know? I've never had a baby before. But I do know that I've wanted to be pregnant for my entire life it seemed. So I of course want to show, I want to look pregnant, not for tons of attention no but for the whole "I look and feel pregnant" part of it.

I'm going to get over this starting now because I know its even ridiculous I'm writing this but sometimes it hurts my feelings when people act like my baby is some undernourished tiny baby. I'm healthy and believe me I have cottage cheese legs like you wouldn't believe so I'm not all toned (although I would like to be). So I just don't get why someone would be so rude.

Anyways here's a pic of me now. and I took the liberty of attaching a pic of me at I believe about 10 weeks to show the changes. I feel bigger. I just hope I'm growing as I should. I know all pregnancy's are different and honestly the most important thing to me is that my baby and I are healthy and safe. So forget that mean girl and her rude tone!

And again sorry for the crazy hormonal pregnant women I'm being over here. I just needed to vent :)

Doctors visit.

We went to the Dr. today just to make sure everything was OK with little Cooper man. I was having some uncomfortable things going on that were new and just for piece of mind we went.
First of all my Dr. talked with me for a while about everything and then we started the ultrasound. First of all the heartbeat sounded great. Then we just watched him for about 10 minutes moving around (he's really active). I don't feel him moving though very much.
Then our Dr. got a call he had to take so his nurse Finley came in and started doing the ult. We got to watch him and see his face for about 20 minutes. He was just moving around and he looked at us straight on a few times. It was great. Then the Dr. came back in and started to take over.
When we were done he started telling me that its totally common and normal for a woman that has gone through what we have to be having anxiety about how the baby's doing. (Which I have often). He said that having miscarriages and problems conceiving for years on end puts us in a different group of pregnant women. He was so nice and he told me he expects me to be worried all the time, pessimistic almost. But he also told me that we are doing great and so is our little man.
Cooper is head down as of right now. I guess this is normal? He also said..... wait for it..... yes ladies its true, THE PLACENTA HAS RISEN AND IS NO LONGER IN THE WAY OF MY CERVIX OPENING!!!!! this is amazing news. He said that it finally started moving and that the placenta previa we were facing shouldn't be a problem that if it keeps moving upward (even at a slow pace) then all is well. YAY!
so we left the office happy and feeling good. I have a new picture I'm posting but we had some better pics taken at the Dr's office but the machine wouldn't print them out. So they said we can go back to get them later today. So for now here's the one pic that we did get. Its his little face and he's pushing it into the side of my uterus I believe so its sort of only half of his face.
I'm just so glad he's doing OK. This week has been a hard one for us but seeing him and talking with the Dr was really good for us. He assured us that all is well and that's it totally normal to worry. Thanks doc Nil. Your amazing!
My husband and I are going to visit my family this weekend. I'm so excited to show them the pics and see them all.

My mind is full of silly worries.

I should start this message off by saying that last year, On May 20th my husband and I were delivered some terrible heartbreaking news. We were informed that our 6-1/2 week old pregnancy wasn't going to make it and that I would be having a miscarriage in the following weeks. We were devastated and broken. One year later I will be 21 weeks 1 day pregnant with a miracle baby that we prayed for every day. I'm not usually the type to live in the past but for some reason being pregnant again at this time of the year one year after that terrible news makes me scared and of course puts bad thoughts in my head.
Yesterday I started feeling a really dull pain in my very low left side. Normally I would say this is indigestion or growing pains but this time it didn't go away so I started letting my mind wander. I have been going to the restroom regularly (sorry for the tmi). But I have been and so I eliminated that, and the growing pain idea just doesn't seem right. Its not quite that type of pain. Honestly it feels like a huge cyst. I also should mention that I am starting the 1st day of week 20 today. Yay halfway point. I started to let my mind get the best of me and started worrying about the fact that I'm having this weird pain, the fact that I'm 20 weeks and still don't really feel him moving. All these things started to play on my mind and I couldn't help but call the Dr. (which I've been so good about not doing.) I have only called my Dr. when I saw blood otherwise I just sucked it up and let it pass and then my apt would come and everything was fine. But I gave in this time. Maybe because of the events I'm remembering, I don't know? I feel silly though. I feel like I should have some more self control not to freak out and call the doctor for a pain that's not normal. Pregnancy is all about not normal pains. But yet I called and now I'm going to the doctor Thursday morning at 8:30 just for piece of mind. The nurse was SOOO sweet and understanding but I still feel silly for making it probably way more than it is.
Its amazing what your mind can do to you. I need to learn to be a stronger person. To stand above these thoughts and worries. I need to just keep praying and let God handle it.
So I have to say "God please help our angel baby to keep growing safely and healthy and for my body to be a safe good place for him to grow and become ready to live in this world with us".
Thanks for listening girls. Sometimes I feel the only thing I can do is just let it out to you guys.

So they say he can hear now.

Baby center, what to expect, the pregnancy journal, one of my many books/web pages I read about my pregnancy weekly on mentioned that he should be able to hear whats going on outside the womb now. I'm 2d into my 19th week right now and although I know he can't understand a word that anyone is saying, he just hears sounds I feel like we should at least "try" not to talk badly. I do on occasion say things that probably aren't for child ears but I'm really not bad. But last night we went to Nana's (my husbands nana). All the fam was over there and the teen boys, uncles, aunts and everyone had some really interesting convo's while we were there. Needless to say I started making jokes that maybe next time we visit them we should bring some headphones for my belly so we can play music and he won't hear the things that were being said.
Yikes what about when he's actually here? He's bound to hear them and yah its funny right now when he's not repeating things but if he's 3 years old and he says any number of the comments one of my teen cousins said, I would freak!

On another subject, last night I'm sleeping nice and sound with my c-shaped pillow and I wake up with some sort of (not bad) stomach discomfort. BTW I'm also on my back! I know they say to try not to sleep on your back but I can't help it. I just wake up that way and although I'm sure everything is fine you can't help but worry yourself back to sleep. How the heck am I supposed to stop sleeping on my back?

Oh and one more thing, Still not feeling the little guy move. Which is fine, if he's not ready to punch me hard enough for me to feel it than thats fine. I know my time will come but I just worry, I sure hope I feel it in the next few weeks. I thought I might be feeling it. It was sort of like a constant popping bubble in the same area for about 10 min straight but nothing too obviouse and it hasn't come back much so I have no idea.

I hope everyone has a great weekend.